The power of choosing myself.

I had to move through self-doubt without letting the voices in my head take over:

Am I good enough?
Prepared enough?
Will people believe in what I have to offer?

I knew confidence wouldn’t just appear. I had to earn it.

The first step?
Becoming truly capable.

I came across the 4Cs of leadership development, something my friend Robbie Swale often writes about. It outlines a powerful sequence—one that applies not just to leadership but to any meaningful pursuit:

• Commitment to the path
• Courage to take the first step
• Capability to navigate and grow
• Confidence as the result of mastery

This clicked.
Because that’s how we build trust in ourselves.
Confidence doesn’t show up at the start—it shows up when we do.

So I committed.

I trained in Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Integrative Wellness, Shadow Work, Emotional Processing, and Integrative Attachment Theory (IAT).

Studying Attachment Theory changed something in me. I began to see how my subconscious, while trying to protect me from failure, rejection, or embarrassment, can also keep me small.

It was humbling, and it brought back memories: In sixth grade, I was eleven, chasing a crush with nothing but shaky courage. I had the same fear and chatter, but I moved anyway.

I felt it again, early in my career, when a multimillion-dollar client said, "I don’t want to see the big honchos. I want to meet the designer.”

I threw up before the meeting—my body in full rebellion. But I showed up anyway and closed the deal.

And that’s the thing, the subconscious doesn’t just store fear. It also remembers the times we stepped in, the times we dared.Somewhere along the way, I had stopped doing that. I was waiting for permission I didn’t need.

So I rewrote the script.

I began to trust my skills, experience, and the depth of my care.I realized the limits I felt weren’t coming from the world.They were mine, and mine to unlearn.If I wanted to matter to myself, I had to act like I did.

So I began.

Replacing old beliefs with ones that moved me forward.
Leaning into the strengths that had always been there.

And in that process, I found more than confidence.
I found clarity. Purpose. A new way to connect with myself and others.

Now, I work with people ready to unlearn the stories holding them back.
Not to become someone else, but to remember—and to return, finally, to themselves.